Thursday, October 9, 2014

The End of the Road

I apologize for my radio silence the past couple of weeks. I was planning to write two prior posts to this one regarding Camp Grow and Glow and the Class 6 exam, but unfortunately after two years of heat and humidity my computer seems to have finally broken. I am writing this post from the main island of Tongatapu. This will be my final entry in this blog.
It is difficult to summarize two years in a few short paragraphs, let alone to try to explain the myriad of emotions I feel about leaving Vava’u – my home for the past two years – to return to America. I will, however, attempt to do so.

When I applied to Peace Corps I wanted and fully expected to go to Africa. To me Peace Corps and Africa were practically synonymous. When I was invited instead to Tonga in the South Pacific I was actually disappointed, which was not helped by well-meaning friends telling me that I must be so happy not to have been placed in Africa, or my Peace Corps recruiter emailing me that I had won the “lottery.”

On my arrival to Tonga, I tried to move past my disappointment and continue with an open mind, but I don’t think that I truly did. Initially, I struggled to come to terms with my preconceived notions of what my life as a volunteer should be and what it actually was. I distinctly remember telling another volunteer that I was worried that Tonga would never feel like “home.”

Yet, somewhere in that spell, I fell in love with Tonga and specifically, Vava’u. I came to cherish the generosity of the people, the beauty of the country, and the friendliness of the islands. I have been remarkably fortunate to have lived in three villages that have supported and opened their arms to me from day one. I have made significant friendships with numerous Tongans that I will long hold dear, and formed life-long friendships with other volunteers. I have worked with three amazing teachers, and there will always be a special place in my heart for the children of GPS Houma.

The last week has been extremely emotional with numerous goodbyes and many generous parting gifts given to me. I was greatly touched by how many people took the time to say goodbye to me and spoke so fondly of our last two years together. Each goodbye was special in its own unique way. My Baha’i friends invited me to dinner in their home, gave me a beautiful necklace, and wrote a poem for me. My teachers and their families took me out on their boat to explore the islands, swim, and have a picnic on the beach.

On Wednesday – my final day in Vava’u and the second and last day of the Class 6 exam –the three villages held a farewell feast in my honor. With all of my students and their parents in attendance and a massive amount of food heaped on top of the tables, I stood up in front of the crowd while my students presented me with gifts and hugs. I couldn’t help but tear up as I was given woven baskets, place mats, coasters, fans, bags, and many necklaces. After all of the presents, I made a thank you speech and was overcome with emotion as I attempted to explain how much the last two years has meant to me and express my love for our community. Once I finished, various people stood up and thanked me for my service.

That afternoon, I went to every single house in each of the three villages to say goodbye to each person. This took me four hours, but I felt a strong need to say a personal goodbye to each person and provide closure for our relationship.

Through all of this, I was highly emotional and continuously tearing up, but it hadn’t hit me that I was leaving. I just didn’t really believe it. The following morning, before my flight at 1 pm, I went to the school to say goodbye to my kids and this was when it hit me. Hugging every kid, I completely broke down and unashamedly and fiercely wept. All of my kids and teachers were crying as well as we were all overcome with the emotion of the moment. I will never forget that moment, and the love I feel for that school and those kids.

It is with bittersweet feelings that I leave this South Pacific Paradise. After two years, I am ready to move on to the next chapter of my life, begin my career, and strive to reach new heights. I have missed my friends and family, and am eager to return to them. But, at the same time, a piece of me will forever remain in Vava’u, with the Tongans in Ha’akio, Houma, and Mangia. I have created a new life for myself here as Soni, the pcv, and it is with a heavy heart that I leave that behind. I hope to one day return to Tonga, but I may never again see so many of the people who made my life here so special. I came to Tonga to make a small difference in the lives of the people and in the end it is the people of Tonga – my friends, community, neighbors, and co-workers – who have changed me forever.

Thank you all for your continued readership of this blog and for your support. At first I found this blog to be a burden, but in time, as with Tonga, I began to enjoy it and view the blog as a kind of living diary, a way to share my experiences with those who read it. Thank you for giving that to me and for everything else.


‘Ofa atu